Run No 1625 - Near Ikea Malaga
Location: somewhere between a massive blue building and the airport.
As the car park was located right at the entrance of a well-known Swedish Store, notorious for swallowing up unsuspecting families, which are never to be seen again, I half expected we would be given a handful of flour and be told to get on with it. However, things weren't quite like that; there was a distinctive DIY moment later on in the circle, but more about that later.
Stiff Fanny told us it was a fairly long run – and is the Pope Catholic? - so I was a bit surprised when I got to the On In after about 500 metres... Further behind me, there was confusion all around, but fortunately, Red Hot Chilly Pepper soon arrived to help the other runners from the frying pan into the fire. Asking Red Hot for directions is a bit like asking an IKEA employee for the shortest way out of the store, and indeed she took the rest of the pack right to where I had been scratching my head earlier on.
In the meantime, RubHerTurd and Ginger Minger had found the real trail and soon order was restored; after that there was no further trail confusion. Well, at least not for the serious runners.. A few clicks further along, we came to a tunnel, or should I say sewage pipe, and although From Behind had previously gone through and widened the tunnel by about 3 metres, this was still not enough for Yogi GBH Bi-Polar Bear (just writing his name takes care of half my run report, bless him), who chose to cross the road instead. Apart from turning three MAERSK trailers that were silly enough to ignore him into total write-offs on the motorway, he then proceeded to follow the In Trail to the second Beer Stop.
The rest of the runners did what was required of them and arrived at the first BS without too many problems. As usual, Stiffy had prepared a veritable feast of Holy Guacamole, Onion Rolls and other seemingly edible things for us and we munched it all down to recover from the first 6 clicks. There was still a similar distance to go, passing through some prime real estate and a few streets of Churriana, but somehow managing to run on dirt tracks most of the way. Admirable work by the Hares, I must say.
The Circle:
The run was awarded a round “Nein!”
Aniversarios: Muzzle-Him (aka The Man They Couldn't Name) 25 r*ns!, From Behind 35, Sperm Aid 285 and RubHerTurd 320. The fact that this inseparable couple had such a discrepancy in their run numbers was much commented upon. Some people were criticizing Rubher for leaving this poor waif behind to clean the house, others were not so sure that this is what she was doing while he was hanging out with a bunch of losers on the Hash.. I leave it to the reader to make up their own mind.
Return Knees: El Cid, accompanied by his little boy Ginger Minger.
Then it was time for the DIY section: The Most Honourable and Generous Jerry Can, who had feasted us on Friday to celebrate his birthday was called out and given all the ingredients for a birthday cake. See pictures below.
Well, it was a 60th Birthday actually, but it was pretty much the same idea.. poor Jerry Can was strapped to the seat and helped mix the dough himself. Fortunately, the birthday cake was the dry type. See pictures below.
We then went off to the restaurant, where we feasted on liver and Chianti.. See pictures below
Yours, in great haste,
Just In