Run 1682 - 23 Feb 2020
Contender for Run of the Year 2020
Hash Stats:
Hares: Stiffany and Speed Bumps
Marks for the Run: 8.6
Location: Cartama
Number of Hounds: 30
Visitors: Airhead and Special Price
Distance: Map: 7.1 km. Scribe over 8km
Virgins: None.
Returners: NC
Anniversarios:
French erection 155
Just In 265
Pussy Galor 340
Max Elevation: 1348 ft Completion time: 2hrs 14m (per hares).
Hash Narrative:
Our hares, Stiffany, Speedbumps and from behind promised us virgins, not one, not two, … but 72. Yes, in Iran or in heaven and only for good “Muzlimz” like Salmonella Rushdie (I won’t share any of these lot with you), however for the hashers that did make the effort to drive out to Cartama they had the opportunity to run in virgin territory, with breath taking views (if you could lift your head up or take the time to stop), trails for machos, trail for walkers and a trail for wimps.
All in all 30 hashers turned up to this wonderful spot in Cartama, the first half of the Macho’s run was just short of 8Km which was practically up one side of the mountain, down the other and backup the other side an ascend and descend of 500m, pumping the heart beat of even the fittest to 120.
I thoroughly enjoyed the run and this is one good example of how we can all drive just another 10 or 20 minutes further out into the country side to look for new trails and with a bit of effort set runs to cater for FRBs and wimps. An effort that earned a high 8.1 marking from me and an average of 8.6.
The circle saw amongst many celebrations; two hash birthdays: Pepper Grinder and Choirboy who enjoyed a queery and juicy kiss from three hot, stunning, gagging females one of which was a virgin and made him cum with cream on a stick as hard as a carrot.
Apparently sperm production is best at lower temperatures (hence your balls hanging out) and further enhanced by ice kindly provided from behind for the birthday boys. Freddy Mercury would have cum too if only he could.
Our visitors Airhead and Special Price thoroughly enjoyed their walk and SP even admitted that she got the battery for her earing aid at the chinese at a special price (no wonder why they stopped working, before she even got to the hash).
Down Down carried on pouring on to our anniversarios. Sparky You old bastard, surprised us with his return, while Mummy’s boy celebrated his return to the land of living after 45 minutes of visiting the other side last year. He cannot remember much, but he is still fat, he is still round, and he is still his Mummy’s Boy.
On On Salmonella Rushdie
PS. I think after thirty years I deserve to be promoted as Ayatollah Salmonella Rushdie.
Next Run #1682
Sunday 23 Feb 2020
15:00 hrs
Avoid Dehydration
Bring Your Water Bottle
Keep Scrolling Down
Make Sure You Read All Run Information
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Hares:Stiffany and Speed Bumps
Circle: Cartama
Come and join us this Sunday, for somewhere we have not been to for a long time, if ever! We have an amazing run for you.
Cartama is a superb location, with History and superb views.
There will be a regular run/walk, a Macho run and a wimpy walk for the limpers, and those with a medical certificate.
This is NOT a town run.
On On your Hares
Navigation to the Circle:
Google Maps link to the circle.
36.708073,-4.632200
Directions: ***See navigation above***
From Fuengirola/Benalmádena take the A7 direction to Málaga
At the dual carriage way split/bifurcation stay left A7 direction to Almería/Málaga Cártama/ Córdoba Granada Sevilla
Take the exit 232 signposted A-357 Málaga (Oeste) Cártama – P. Tecnológico.
On the exit ramp, bear left taking the exit signposted A-357 Cártama / Mercamálaga / Parque Tecnológico.
Carry on bearing left going towards the A-357 Cártama /Parque Tecnológico.
From the A-357 dual carriage way going towards Campillos, take the exit 54 signposted CÁRTAMA / ESTACIÓN DE CÁRTAMA
At the roundabout off the exit ramp, take the 3rd exit which goes under the dual carriage way onto the A-7057.
At the second round about go straight on and take the 1st exit.
At the third round about go straight on and take the exit with the signposted “centro ciudad” a-355 COÍN.
Carry on straight, as a point of reference there is a “Cepsa Petrol Station” drive passed the station and play attention to your left.
*Take the sharp left Exit that is signposted “centro urbano” 10 ALHAURÍN EL GRANDE
Carry on straight on Calle Santo Cristo and follow the street.
At this stage please slow down and keep an eye for a shop called “Supernova DECORACIÓN” on your left.
Calle Santo Cristo will narrow down and go up towards the left between the “PODÓLOGO...” shop and an old Spanish Phone box – “Telefónica”.
Calle Santo Cristo will merge into Calle Azahar will merge into Calle Castillo and the run start will be on your left.
From Coín or nearby:
Take the A-355 towards MÁLAGA CAMPILLOS
At the end of the road at the big roundabout take the 2nd exit signposted A-357 Cártama Málaga
From the A-357 take exit Nº 52 Signposted CÁRTAMA/COÍN
At the first roundabout, take the 1st exit signposted A-7059 CÁRTAMA COÍN
At the second Round about take the second exit signposted A-7057 CÁRTAMA / ALHAURÍN EL GRANDE MA-3304.
Keep an eye on the right hand side where you will see the signpost CÁRTAMA and just after there is an exit to the right singposted ALHAURÍN EL GRANDE 10
Carry on straight on Calle Santo Cristo and follow the street.
At this stage please slow down and keep an eye for a shop called “Supernova DECORACIÓN” on your left. Calle Santo Cristo will narrow down and go up towards the left between the “PODÓLOGO” shop and an old Spanish Phone box – “Telefónica”.
Calle Santo Cristo will merge into Calle Azahar will merge into Calle Castillo and the run start will be on your left.
From the E15/A7 take the A357 signposted Malaga Cartama
Take exit 54 signposted Estacion/ Cartama at the roundabout take the 3rd exit towards Coin A7057
Straight on at the next two roundabouts after about 1 km take care you need to take a sharp left into Calle Alhaurin el Grand.
Take a slight left into Calle Santo Cristo then left into Calle Azahar go straight into Calle Castillo then left into Calle Puerto.
The run site is on the left.
We will put signs out. It is about 30 mins drive from Fuengirola.
OnOn: Badulake in Cartama
Calle Alcaudón, 5, 29570 Cártama, Málaga
Tel: 952 42 23 63
We have found a great little Tex Mex restaurant that has specialty beers.
With wine at €1.50 a glass it is cheap and cheerful with great food only a short walk from the run site.
Navigation to The OnOn:Google Maps link to the OnOn.
OnOn Menu: Order off the card.
Price: €. Cheap
Lost Soles or Info:
Phone: +34 600 80 59 07